Yellow Blackout

It always seemed impossible to me that a boy like you would ever love a girl like me. What could you possibly be attracted to? I was so proud to have you... But I was always scared that it was a dream and that I would wake up without you. So before you had a chance to realize that you've made a horrible mistake and leave me in an ocean of shame and loathing, I decided to leave you. Better to hurt than to get hurt right? And of course, like a magnet, I would always come back to you. But it was too late - my actions had altered the course of our lives forever. Is it my fault? No doubt. Do I regret my actions? With every breath. Am I to you what you are to me or has time and experience changed you? I imagine this life and I'm filled with hope. A positive blackout.