These are not in any particular order, but they describe me to a tee. Enjoy!
1
I really do. I also believe that silently muttering this a billion times keeps me sane and stops me from killing people. The phrase is so versatile that it can be used in a myriad of situations:
Eating something tasty: WTF is in this?! It's so good!
Eating something not so tasty: WTF is in this?! Bleugh!
Getting shocked: WTF just happened???
While exercising: WTF am I going to eat for dinner?
You get my point...
2
I get ghetto-fabulous when I get angry. I always have and I probably always will. The finger wagging, the head swagger, the uncontrollable use of the phrase "oh no you di'int!" - it's all there.
3
This e-card has a supporting picture that makes me laugh till I cry. I have a Harry Potter marathon once every six months (books and movies, both). I know almost all of the lines and I get super-excited be people who love Harry Potter as much as I do.
"Five points to Gryffindor!"
*If you can't read that second image, CLICK HERE, or the picture itself. So worth it.
4
This couldn't be more true. I've had a number of distraught girlfriends cry out on how bad things always happen to them and how sure they were that the drug addict who's never worked anywhere without needing to use the phrase "Would you like fries with that?" would have made a fabulous father/ husband.
I'm all for fate and karma and a higher power, but seriously, your relationship probably failed because he was a useless jerk-off and you made the decisions to move him in to your house and have him depend on you financially as well as emotionally.
5
If I held a family reunion, it would most like be me, my husband, and lots of food. My family sucks, both on my father's side as well as my mothers. I don't even like most of them and I can't be bothered to fake affection and freeze a smile on my face while hanging out with them. In my 26 years of life, it was only last May while my mother was toward the end of her terminal illness that her and her siblings all got along at once. Otherwise one brother won't be speaking, or an aunt will be angry. Useless, I tell you...
6
Sometimes Zak asks me things and when I respond he'll smile because I'd be completely off the mark. In my head, I would replay it scene by scene and swear that I was right. Then, to prove my infinite wrongness, he'll ask me what I ate for lunch that day and I wouldn't be able to tell him, even though my sanity depended on it. I can't tell it it's getting worse with age... but I figure if it's this bad at 26, I won't remember shit at 50.
Blog? What's a blog?
7
A couple years ago my Friday nights were filled with crazed, blurred memories and all-night dancing. After a while my crazy Friday nights turned to dinners with friends and good conversation. Now, all I really want is to sit in front of the television and watch entire seasons of Lost and Big Bang Theory in one sitting.
8
I think that jealousy is just built into people. The range of jealousy differs in each person, but everyone's got a little something that makes them jealous. Most of Zak's female friends I'm completely ok with. I know I have my shit together and that my man is coming back home, but there are some women who I know are just up to no good, home-wrecking whores. Every single time I've highlighted someone to having not-so-good intentions, they really didn't, so now Zak just listens to me...
9
It's the little things that matter. Sometimes a bra/panty set that matches my outfit makes me feel like superwoman. Granny panties don't get shit done, but matching sexy sets rest the world on my palm.
10
That's for damn sure. Life has thrown many curves my way, and I've made some not so great decisions, but in the end, they weren't that bad after all.
Check out these and other great e-cards on my Pinterest board, E-cards, Meme's, & other Words!
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